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It was Palm Sunday, and because of a sore throat, 5 year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm branches. The boy asked what they were for. "People held them over Jesus' head as He walked by." "Wouldn't you know it!!" the boy fumed, "The one Sunday I don't go, He shows up!" One Easter Sunday morning, as the priest was preaching a children's sermon, he reached into his bag of props and pulled out an egg. He pointed at the egg and asked the children, "What's in here?" "I know!" a little boy exclaimed. "Pantyhose!" The prospective father-in-law asked, "Young man, can you support a family?" The surprised groom-to-be replied, "Well, No. I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you will have to fend for yourselves". Little Johnny asked his Grandma how old she was. Grandma answered, "39 and holding". Johnny thought for a moment, and then said, "And how old would you be if you let go?" A little boy in church for the first time, watched as the ushers took up the collection. When they came near his pew, the boy said loudly, "Don't pay for me Daddy. I'm under five". The Sunday School teacher asked, "Now, Johnny, tell me, do you say prayers before eating?" "No sir," he replied, "We don't have to. My Mom is a good cook!" "Oh, I sure am happy to see you", the little boy said to his grandmother on his mother's side. "Now, maybe Daddy will do the trick he has been promising us". The grandmother was curious. "What trick is that?" she asked. "I heard him tell Mommy that he would climb the walls if you came to visit", the little boy answered. US Air recently introduced a special half fare for wives who accompany their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonies, the PR Department sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed thier trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, "What trip?". "Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees. "Yes, sir", the new employee replied. "Well, then, that makes everything just fine", the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your Grandmother's funeral, she stopped in the see you!" |
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